Living with Migraines

Living With Migraines

(I wrote this a few years back and thought I would share) 

October 28, 2004

There are at least 28 million Americans who suffer migraines (According to data released by the National Headache Foundation, this is equal to one migraine sufferer in every four U.S. households). And, nearly 14 million Americans suffer migraines and don’t even know. People who suffer migraines live and deal with the pain. It is, without a doubt, frustrating, painful, tiring and depressing. But migraines do not affect only those afflicted with the curse. Migraines also take their toll on the sufferer’s loved ones. They see the physiological and emotional changes and are helpless to comfort them. Living with migraines is a combined struggle that can leave a family in desperation.

My husband has suffered migraines for the last 12 years; but due to the lack of proper medical guidance, he has progressively gotten worse. It all seemed to start when he had 3 rear-enders in an 18 month time span. The last of the accidents was the worst, with his head turned to the side and whip lashed his neck. And the headaches didn’t start right away. They came sporadically at first—a headache once every couple of months. But as time progressed, they happened more frequently and lasted longer until there isn’t a day that goes by when Anthony is not in pain.

The military doctors Anthony saw would treat the symptoms instead of finding the root of the problem and correct that. He went from doctor to doctor, medication to medication. You name it, I’m sure he tried it. He’s been on a number of different daily regimes of medications to help “prevent” the migraines. He’s had a variety of medications to choose from when the migraines come. I even paid for chiropractic treatment, in hopes that would help. Nothing has completely alleviated the pain. Very few treatments have subsided the pain enough so he can semi-function in his daily routine. He’s tired. He’s run down. He’s depressed. And he’s come to the conclusion that this is going to be his way of life for the rest of his life.

Anthony is a stubborn sort, yet proud. He dreaded going to the clinic when he had a headache. He dreaded the constant battle he had to go through to convince his superiors and doctors he wasn’t faking. He dreaded the same old medicine the doctors prescribed that didn’t even put a dent in his suffering. He dreaded the loss of time and the physical state the medicine always left him with. After years of doing all this, he nearly gave up. And when his last doctor told him that if he re-enlisted he would undoubtedly be forced out of the military, he saved face, completed his obligation and got out with an Honorable Discharge. So, now he lost his job, his career, his dream. And now he’s left feeling inadequate. He’s left with the fact that no one will hire him when they find out that he may have to go home early from the pain, or not even be able to come in at all.

One year went by and Anthony was still so traumatized by all doctors in the military he saw, he only went to see the civilian doctors to renew his prescriptions. Again, he would have to tell his history over to new doctors. It wasn’t until we moved to Jacksonville last year that we were presented with a wider, and possibly better, choice of doctors. And it wasn’t until he realized one day that he couldn’t even get out of bed to take care of our son that he needed to really do something about the pain. And so, he began his quest for a better life.

Our new family doctor listened to his history and set him on another daily medication routine. But, this one was different. It was not the typical low dose, anti-depressants he was used to; but, rather, a beta blocker. He was also given a migraine nasal inhaler that worked almost instantly when a migraine attacked. He was also referred to a neurologist who gave him an MRI and determined nothing neurologically was wrong. But, there is a misalignment of one of his vertebrae in his neck. We believe this to be the underlying problem. The Neurologist also prescribed Physical Therapy, three times a week for four weeks. And over the course of 3 months, Anthony noticed the migraines coming less often, the desire to do things again—even get out of the house, and he had hope that he may be getting better.

Unfortunately, circumstances brought about a change in medical treatment. With the threat of a possible lay off for me, no health insurance, no income, we had to stop most of Anthony’s treatments. We had to pick and choose what medications we could afford and get them while we still could. Anthony’s reprieve was short lived. He started going back to the way he was before we moved here—except, the migraines were not as often. He still had them, though. But the chronic pain was always there. Some days were worse than others. But everyday was a day of pain.

I’ve seen the face of pain. I’ve seen him balled up on the floor whimpering. I’ve seen him sleep for 36 hours because of the medication he took. I’ve seen him through bouts of insomnia. There isn’t anything he enjoys to do anymore. He cannot enjoy life. But most of all, he cannot enjoy his son. I hate seeing how depressed he has become. I hate not being able to do anything for him. I hate what our lives have become…a daily routine of fighting the pain. But most of all, I hate the pain.

I don’t think he will ever be 100% better and we struggle with the costs of the treatments. But we are doing our best with what we have. Our family is strong. Our will is strong. We will survive. Every migraine sufferer—the one with the migraine or the supporting one—has a different story, but the root is the same. You are not alone. I commend the sufferer for their perseverance through the pain. And I commend the families for their strength and support. It isn’t easy living with migraines. They affect everyone around.

*Note: If you suffer headaches and experience any of these symptoms:

• Nausea or vomiting
• Sensitivity to light and/or sound
• Stuffy or runny nose and watery eyes
• Dizziness
• Mood changes
• Tunnel vision or seeing ''spots''

Or have any of these types of pains:

• Pain on one or both sides of the head
• Pain in the back of the neck
• Pain or pressure in the face, eye area, or sinuses
• Pain that disrupts normal activity
• Pain that is aggravated by routine activity
  
  

Please visit and take the headache quiz. You may be suffering a migraine and not know it. There is help for you!

Far From You Review

Far from You by Lisa Schroeder

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


This is my third.
I've read reviews
I've heard people talk.
Some good.
Some bad.

But honestly,
I think this is by far
her best
of the three.

She said,
this is her least known.
I don't know why.

It's not really
about the story
as much as it is
about evoking
great emotion.
The characters aren't
deep
but they do
grow.
The plot isn't
thick
but keeps you
riveted.

I sat on my couch
reading the last of it,
tears streaming down my face,
emotion overflowed.

Her books are journeys
from negative
to positive.
A common thread
in all her works
is
Death is not
the end.

View all my reviews

New Additions To Our "Garden"

Our builder seemed to have a notion to jam as many plants in a small space as possible. Our project is to thin it out and replant with plants we WANT not what the builder decided to put in. It's a slow process, and when money allows, we add what we can.

This past weekend's work involved Bee Balm. We wanted something that would attract hummingbirds and butterflies. I first thought I would get a Butterfly Bush, but I know that hummingbirds love the color red. The Butterfly Bushes I found were only purple or white. We may go back and get these later but we decided to on the Bee Balm since the flowers were red. Getting them out of the area with the rest of them was very difficult. Many of the stalks were bent and broke on  the pots in the group. I picked out the best looking pots and only lost one stalk in the tangles. We brought them home and waited until early evening to plant since it was just so hot.

We had to remove the dying bushes that hardly got any water from the side of the porch.










We dug down deep and wide, filled the holes with good soil, fertilizer and planted the Bee Balm. Everything looked nice. :)

I checked on them the next morning and all seemed well. But sometime in the afternoon, when I went to go water them, several of the stalks were laying on the ground, half broken off. It was like something trampled them. This happened for the next couple of days until we decided that it may just be the wind cutting around the corner of the house. With no support and the stalks being top heavy, they were just falling over and breaking.



So we decided to build them a support structure. Here you can see it is similar to the Tomato cages. So far this has supported them rather nicely. Here's hoping it stays that way and the butterflies and hummingbirds are not afraid of it.

And we have bloomage! :D 

Martini and More... Review

Martini and More . . . by Randy Register

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


This is a collection of short stories in the everyday setting that anyone could appreciate. Ever wonder what a male thinks? Register gives delightful insight on the male perspective of love and loss in his collection. Definitely a nice read, especially on those lazy days during the summer months with a glass of tea in your other hand (or a Martini if you are so inclined).



View all my reviews

I Heart You, You Haunt Me Review

I Heart You, You Haunt Me by Lisa Schroeder

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


I read out of order
Chasing Brooklyn first.
No need to worry,
a companion book needs no back story.



Similar in many ways
of death
grief
a hint of haunting
a journey of healing.



I'm enjoying the novel in verse
enjoying Lisa Schroeder
but are all three books
similar in ways
of death
grief
a hint of haunting
a journey of healing?



We shall see
when I read her third
Far From You



View all my reviews

Chasing Brooklyn Review

Chasing Brooklyn by Lisa Schroeder

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


This was my first encounter
with a novel in verse.
It opened my eyes
to my own possibilities.

Beautiful words describing
grief
and how it's different
for everyone.

Beautiful words describing
the journey
to overcome that
grief.

Beautiful words describing
a path to healing
and unexpected
love.

And now, the book complete,
I have my own stories
floating
flittering
forming
that must be written
I may just try
my own
novel
in
verse.







View all my reviews

An Answer to My Own Question

I would like to thank everyone who held on to their patience with Blogger and was able to post their response to my previous question. If you missed the question I posed, please feel free to read it and come back here to read my own answer.

It's been several days of since my last post. It has given me ample time to read everyone's responses, as well as get over some sickness going around our house. Each response is greatly valued. I only wish more had posted. But, hey, I've got a general consensus!  And now, I think I really have been enlightened.

As with many readers, I read to escape the problems of every day life. I always have. I was an only child growing up in a military family. Moving around often was inevitable. I do not know the meaning of having a friend in one place more than a couple of years. I was a very lonely child. Reading was my escape. The characters were my friends. Now, as an adult, I still read for pleasure. I read to escape my world of worry, pain, and suffering.

Our lives, no matter who we are, have varying degrees of trouble we all wish we could escape. Yes, life is not fair. Life doesn't care. And life doesn't always have a happy ending. Our stories we read (or create) should offer a spark of hope, no matter how tiny. Because without hope, what's the point in life? Right?!

*SPOILER ALERT* in case anyone hasn't watched these movies I am about to talk about (Skyline and Buried). If you haven't seen them yet, and don't want to have them spoiled, don't read any further. But I feel I am pretty safe since both these movies I am talking about are rather old, or at least have been out for a while. 

I recently watched the movie, Skyline. Essentially, it was the end of our world. Humans were being harvested by aliens. The two main characters--male and female--were struggling to escape. Their outlook was dismal at best.  In the end, the human race seems to have been wiped off the face of the Earth. Despite this fact, there was a glimmer of hope when both main characters succumb to their inevitable end and get sucked up into the alien mother ship to be harvested like the rest. The male main character's brain is harvested and put into an alien creature.  With a love so great for his family, the male main character overcomes the alien mentality, seeks out his beloved and lets her know his brain is still there before the female main character is harvested.

Now, the other movie I watched a few months back, called Buried, well, that was a real downer! The main character is a government contractor who has been taken and buried in a coffin somewhere in the Iraqi desert. He only has a lighter and a cell phone. It is a story about his last few hours. The whole time you watch this movie you are rooting for him to be found, and in the end, when it looks like he will be dug up in time, and you almost breath a sigh of relief...well, you get the idea.

I would not recommend either of these movies, by the way. However, one offered a spark of hope in the face of armageddon while the other offered hope the entire way through and ended on a crushing note. The point is, hope in any form is an integral part of every story.

I think I am remembering a few of my High School English class mandatory readings. If anyone has ever read Shirley Jackson's The Lottery, Arthur Miller's Death of a Salesman, or any number I can't remember right off the top of my head. But there was a time it seems, where dismal, somber, and hopeless had their place. But, those may have easily been published after the author had several published works. Maybe it wasn't their best work, but eventually academia made it so. Who knows. So, I will just add this to my collection of works I've written. It may go in my pile never to be seen or heard from again. Or I may just revamp it completely and make it a more hopeful story. One never knows...